Sometimes, you find out things about people that you didn't want to know. That you wish you could unknow. That sort of change everything you thought you knew, or at least make you reexamine it all.
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The beginning of a semester is always interesting to me, in how I am thoroughly excited for the whole thing, ready to make connections and read critically and write ridiculous amounts. Then classes actually start to grind and everything falls off the wagon. But for now, I'm inspired. Just have no time. But class notes so far have been great thought-fodder.
Talked for a long time today with my mom about figuring out how to reconcile a lot of my own doublethink. On the one hand, there is the wanting to love everyone and care for everyone and just generally be the best friend I can be to everyone. On the other hand, there is the simple fact that that is physically and emotionally impossible.
And that's okay. I know that it's okay. It just comes down to me being willing to accept it into my brain and translate into my actions. It'll happen, just slowly.
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